by Anton Wills-Eve
Imagine being told you only have a week or two to live.
That’s happened to me three times in five years now.
Yet it’s never scared me, made me wonder a lot, yes;
But never caused tearful eyes, or any frowning brow.
Family and friends have been distraught, dejected,
And think my outward courage so admirably brave.
But then, they haven’t got my spiritual imagination,
They cannot understand why I don’t fear the grave.
If you think about it, I am really being rather selfish,
Imagine believing soon you are going to know at last
What Heaven, and the God you love, are actually like.
Imagination is no longer needed, for human life is past.
But you still wonder, though, if in your time on earth
You were as caring and loving as you could have been.
You imagine God judging you, a weak, willing sinner,
While mercifully loving you, he accepts all he’s seen.
Keeping his word he balances the scales he promised
Would decide if your good deeds outweighed the bad.
For if they do, he’ll keep his word, making you atone,
For sins, your imagination knows have made you sad.
But a loving God never sends repentant souls to hell and
Only purgatory makes them wait a while to be with him.
Can you imagine having seen the most loving being of all,
Then being without him? There cannot be a state more grim.
But the virtue of hope is now the one each soul’s imagination
Clings to. Regretting, in sorrow, any wrong they’ve ever done.
Knowing they fully deserve their short, unbearable separation
Until they earn eternity in the arms of their most beloved one.
Now, my imagination dwells on this answer to the mystery
Of life, and why we’ll not understand it until we are dead.
But by praying, believing and living as charitably as I can,
I love God more, awaiting Heaven with him as I go to bed.
[…] Ikigai 157. G.I.R.L – I am not lonely at all 158. My Sighing Companion – hannah t.k. 159. Anton’s Ideas – IMAGINE THIS 160. Haiku Monday – cocoa2 161. The Consulting Writer – I Cannoli Imagine 162. […]
This might sound inane, Anton, but your poem encouraged me to ponder the nature of confession and repentance.
We try to be better people, but we often weaken and fail. God requires honesty, and wants us to do our best, as any loving father would. This makes utter sense, and I have long understood it, but there is a difference between understanding and acceptance.
Each of us is perceived differently by everyone we meet. It is the same way with God – more so, as, in our lifetime, we never see his face. though we are are given many conflicting descriptions of Him. My vision of the creator differs from yours. It is rather more woolly, but I have some inkling of His presence, and you have helped me to visualise Him, and his plan, more clearly.
You are a natural teacher. You teach not by quoting from the Bible, but by the power of your faith, and speaking quietly about your relationship with God. It’s a beautiful thing to see.
Thanks Jane. I know I often say I love God, but have I ever told you where the luck I also profess to have comes in? When I went to Mass for the first time ever at the age of three, at the consecration my God appeared before me and I was filled with a love I can neither explain nor describe. I only know that He loved me back. No matter how often I do things I know I shouldn’t He still smiles on me and I try to show my contrition by helping anyone in any kind of need because He loves them too. That is my faith and how I live it. Nothing more and nothing less. I simply hope and pray my soul will be with Him in our reciprocated love for ever. XX God bless. Anton.